Bankrupt!

"Vindicating something, is harder than obtaining."

I finally open my laptop after a week of absence, since I’m doing SAP workflow training.

No plan, nonetheless I browse all pictures seen on fb home page.

I saw pictures of a friend of mine’s birthday.

Then I hover my mouse cursor in the people tagged, then I saw few names I’ve not ever been contacted, a while..

I saw my friend’s status, and do not realize how she changes her life into more “valuable” now.

I also read another friend’s and knowing how happy she was while I’m gone,

But I also read some of them bugged about something I haven’t been told :(.

I saw some picture of places people visited, and I haven’t.

I also saw my friend’s wedding picture minus me because I couldn’t come :(

Me (with no intention) click on a couple-pict, which the boy was actually mine (crap, don’t believe it), I mean was actually supposed to be mine, I called it my first love :D. My heart was still beating. Not love beat, but memory beat (?). Like, someone has amnesia and suddenly reminiscing something, got it? Weellll this was actually no connectivity with the thing I'm talking about. Just forget it, I don’t know why I wrote it. So stupid. xD

(continue..)

I saw pictures of people surrounding me as team, also my sweet rivals :D.

Few of them has married, few of them disappeared, few of them, I haven’t call or sms his/her back 'till now.

Sh*t.

I saw a picture of people near me, but then I found out they’re too busy, especially on weekend &@%!.

Last, I clicked on my cousin’s album, realized how far she is from here. Miss the sharing one roof time :(

Then I realize how many things I have lost.

Maybe if it is related to money, I am bankrupt now.

Just like my blog post title, I am in trouble of vindicating something.

But I’m not saying it like I’ll start retrieving one; I don’t know where to start still.

Friends are cat and birds sometimes..

some of them going far away but still returns,

some other are around, but they won't coming back.

When we were teens, we play with everyone who gave us plenty of pleasure time.

But when we grow old, we only hang out with someone who gave us only their couple of spare time.

Ps. I don’t wanna grow old :(

Really!

Anyone??

Jangan Menyerah (my version)

reff1:

syukuri apa yang ada
hidup adalah anugerah
tetap jalani hidup ini
melakukan yang terbaik

reff2:
Tuhan pasti kan menunjukkan
kebesaran dan kuasanya
bagi hambanya yang sabar

dan tak kenal putus asa

"jangan menyerah.. jangan menyerah.. jangan menyeraaaaaaaaaaaaaa..aaah.."

Am not a fans of d'masive.
The only personnel i know is Ryan, which claims, looks like my friend's ex :P
But if i should give this band an award, it would be: TERngiang-ngiang.
Why?
Because the idea behind this song, the lyrics, and how they bring those in melody.
First i read this song review in one of the teen magazine (well my sister is still in high school)
This band was inspired by children who severe cancer and tumor in Dharmais, Jakarta.
Then in only 3 hours, the song was born.
It bounds in my memory, since i have friend who hv similar sickness.
From that day on, I really can't forget the song, especially the quotes i typed above.

Moreover, as a ordinary human who lives in capital city, of course clash with problems.
and the word long last : "jangan menyerah".
Amazing isn't it?
This song could absorb any kind of matters.
Me, myself, have intentionally connected the song to whatever problems in me.

The moment i remember my friends (i mentioned before).
The moment i was tired with routinity.
The moment i want to achieve higher but impaired by morality.
The moment i insist to have something but God thinks otherwise.
The moment i was physically sick.
The moment i was sad, broken, tortured, crestfallen..
(..still a lot more)
Until the moment I am angry with lack of humanity, poverty, governmental failures, global warming.
The song still catch along..

:D

That's why i put this song to my ipod: Top Rated list.
And when i bumped into trouble, i play it.

keep on fighting!

cheers :D

Be Left :(

On my daily activities, specifically when am work..
I work together with my seniors in the same field
only me, the junior.
and they really comfortable to talk &work with
I ask everything and consult everything :(
It's like..
Sam the Bro, and Mr.Pendi the (2nd) Dad :p
Those two guys easing me every time i face the critical situations, which needs 1 minute of magical touch so the program will be run as expected..

Yesterday morning, Sam got the phone call, which ends up with roll him off to T*T*L project.
He said only a month, but I'm not sure AT ALL.
It is SHOCKING because i really hate the "allocation curse"..
The program(S) he previously created and changing every month, during Month End Closing.
Really sidestep it cause it holds me in office until 12 AM xD
Yesterday evening, the gmail notification shout me an email with subject: "Release from M***M*S project"
i thought its my release :p
but it is nooooooooooooottt.. (hukk)
but Mr.Pendi is.
He explained his release to me in "informational way" but i read it as "adios" xD
then he mentioned at a glance what should i do then after his leave.

am not afraid, actually.
but nothing frighten me than make me feel "alone" :(
well i hv one member of team remaining, it is Teguh.
He is also like Bro.
But he's like an older bro, and does not like russel in ways me and Sam did :p
..and many topics we can share together..
hu..

Today, was a hand over session w/ Mr.Pendi, and Sam will be on Monday.
Which, i hate it..
Its a session, which sentence like: "If am not here" mentioned repeatedly.
And off course i hate it because, i can't work with him anymore :(
I listen to him and Thank God I understand.
It's not the 1st time he leaving me.
But the feelings always like the first.

I left my thumb drive in his Thinkpad.
He copied me ALLL the material he's been taken care of in the project.
All of them.
We had a different place to lunch.
And when i got back,
I only found my thumb drive in my own laptop.
And he's gone :(


why can't i be cool with project roll off xD
miss you both already :(

a wish (not) comes true (yet)

I have a secret, wish supposed to be not xD
It upsets me when you tell people and they do not believe if u really like what you are doing..
well, i think, the appeareance appeals which i gives to people was: a flashy fingernails shimmy" lipgloss barbie off the dirt?
thanks! but you know what?
I loooOOOOve (trying to make the long 'O' google effect) cooking.. so much!
even now i think am addicted to it.

well am still a beginner but i love to to cook anything.
especially when i did lucky to cook with simple ingredients and turn it "magically" into unusual food which my grandmother and my dad would say: "this is delicious!"
:D happy..

my latest brew was a marlin 'special" teriyaki which i made my only use: 2 marlin fillets, bombay onions, blackpepper, soya sauce, and a tip tea spoon of chinese five seasons (:p cook cheat) - cinnamons, star anise, cloves, fennel, and pepper)
it is very quick and easy to make and my grandma and my dad look satisfied =p yayyy

the stupidest part is...i forgot to take the picture xD

my head always juggling onions, mushroom, pasta, wheat flour, eggs, pepper, chili, and so on, and what i can do to them. And my mother is getting her new headache watching me cooking, and stay long.. slowly but surely, 'equipped' the kitchen :p.

i dont know why, and where i got this new habit.
as long as i know my favorite show now are: rachel ray (the cooking part), ala chef, and discovery travel and living.
is it an aging syndrome O.O? oh no..

Lately i thronged my brain with books of fancy breakfast recipe.
and then i found a beautiful picture of typical bread shape.
it's a waffle!
i totally fall in love with the shape..

(oooh..)

and also the waffle toaster~! :D
i've visited an e-store, and it costs IDR 200,000.
not really expensive i think, but, i'm still thinking about it.

well, actually i can't stop thinking about it xD

am enjoying my hands smells like pepper, onions, paprica, etc and am still learning a lot :D

and am still finding people willing to be "guinea pigs" to taste my "brews" *hahaa*
happy cooking! :D

cheers

a bit of touch

with a bit of touch of:

1) Pressure
2) "Irresistible" people xD
3) Unexpected circumtances
4) monotous environment & activity
5) Ego
6) hopeless efforts
7) impatient
8) economic & social demand
9) a pile of difficult material to understand xD, and
10) PMS


there are prompt ways to reveal your bad side of your character :))
which u don't absolutely know before..

so if you think you don't hv any bad side,
or you think you've known enough about your character,
and already listed down your Alter Ego..

never underestimate what those 10 would reveal


it works!


*salam pusing*

earthquake, isn't it a crisis moment??

gempaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
berasa bgt y dgoyang sanasini kek mainan tower bloxx..
gempa 7,3 SR d tasikmalaya yg sampe post ini dirilis (ehem) uda terjadi 72x gempa susulan..
eniwei, gempa susulan bhs inggrisny apa ya?
continuous earthquake? (gempa susul"an xD)
continuation earthquake? (gempa lanjutan @-))
subsequent earthquake? (ini baru bnr kekny stlh nanya sm tmn kantor yg 9 taun d amerika =p)

kmrn kl g salah skitar jm 15.12-an wkt workshop d ruang meeting tiba" qta smua "bergoyang"..
awalny qta g mkir kl itu gempa, krn biasa deh..
"ada yg goyang" kali" (walopun ank kcil jg taw kl ada orang goyang" g mgkn sampe se-lantai gedung goyang efeknya)
"pusing kali" (walopun jrg banget ad kjadian pusing massal)
akhirny someone of us run away and we followed it that way xD!

qta turun k bawah.
untungny krn cm lantai 3, tenggorokan gw yg puasa ini g kebangetan berasa hausnya :D
dan untungny lagi smua slamet, kluarga, tmn, pacar, smua slmt ALhamduuuulillah
wktu gw turun dan liat orang"
gw jadi ktawa" sndiri krn orang" itu ternyata lucu ya..

1.Susu, tmn kantor gw turun k bawah bw modem telkomflash, ini g membuktikan bahwa d saat gempa telkomflash bs berfungsi menyelamatkan hidup xD
2.Nanang, tmn kntr jg bawa buku serupa buku diary. Hal ini membuat gw bertanya" apakah dia smpet update DIARY saat turun tangga??
3.Mas erwin, bawa notes isi coret"an angka bwt closing. Sang project manager ini mgkn ttp manfaatin wkt turun tangga jg bwt itung alokasi kmudian hasilny dcatat d bawah =p
4.Irene, bawa" tas komplit + majalah fortune. Gw berpikir orang ini super duper prepare, bahkan sedia bacaan untuk menunggu waktu evakuasi selesai dan dnyatakan aman untuk naik kembali xD
5.Tmn" lain yg bawa hape, dan gw, ini wajar, krn qta butuh tlp sanak saudara dan orang" tersayang :D
6.Orang d gedung yg bawa bungkusan makanan :)) i'd rather think she was panic than prepared food while waiting to be evacuated or spending the time waited to be rescued.
7.Org kntr yg g bawa apa", mas pendi, ken dll, ini adalah orang yg bisa jadi too panic, bs jg care sm kselamtan sndiri dlu :D

but guys, cell phone is a MUST. apapun alesanny qta butuh komunikasi, rite :D

Kejadian lucu lainnya pas gempa adalah:
1. Sam, tmn kantor gw, bgtu turun langsung update twitter dan cm blg "earthquaaaaaaaake"
2. Mas didi, tmn kntr gw yg blg d twitter, "kl gempa ada hadist-nya untuk segera berbuka ga?" ahaha
3. Dan berbagai postingan lainnya d twitter yg bkin gw mkir, is it a crisis moment? or not?

Tp top of the TOP hari ini adalah tmn gw, Mayang.
tmn gw yg kbtulan lagi ceting pas gempa langsung tulis:
"GEMPAAAA tls aja dulu",

g pake mkir kl gempa TIDAK terjadi LOKAL :)) skali lagi GEMPA g terjadi LOKAL may :))
ahahah, gara" dy crt ini gw ktawa sndiri d kntr :D

akhrny line ini jd lucu"an qta bersama dan qta mkir kmungkinan" lain about last word they typed before run from earthquake yesterday :D

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA...brb (mgkn dy berpikir turun k bawah wktuny sama dgn cm skedar mampir k toilet)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAAA.. off dlu y (mgkn dy berpikir untuk bw laptop dan matiin modem, gulung charger,copot mouse, fdisk..and so on.. then head to emergency stairs)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAAAA..gtg (ini aga wajar mengingat kl gempa mmg qta harus Got To GO)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA.. miss you (orang pacaran yg olwes tls ini sblm pamit)

tapi ttp aja yg plg lucu hari ini y itu..

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA... tls aj dlu...
aahhahahaha..
ada g y orang yg bales cetingan stelah dkasi taw ad gempa
hhahahahah (g bs berenti)

LOL
piss may :D

cheers

Mesem-mesem

Ahhaha.. gw baru aja g sngaja baca blog sherina, dan dengan sengaja bc blog raditya dika.
aneh y :))
bwt sbagian orang yg bc ini mgkn mkir "penting y?"
ato mgkn dah basi krn britany uda menyebar luas d situs" gosip, radio, tv, even twitter..
and a few days ago, i just caught them talking tenderly to each other with nothing to cover up anymore, keeps me giggling all the time i remember haha..
lucu y, sherina emg unpredictable (bwt yg ngerasa gw uda ngmg gini, sorry kl bosen :D)
what she do, and what she likes..
what she write, and what she read..
what she listen, and what she sing..
her image which is transforming suddenly and also her type ;)) - reminds me of myself a few years ago, when,,, am young *haha*
decided to love someone who just i feel comfortable with..
g ada pertimbangan lain", suka aja, pasti itu jawabanny kl ditanya :))

d blog, sherina puji" si kambing jantan..
tiba" gw jadi merasa g mo kalah jg puji" pacar gw (haha)
d samping emg gw jrg puji" sampe dy ragu gw bnran sk sm dy ap ga..gw mo coba :D
pacar gw itu....:
1. Jelek (oke, its totally screwing the theme)
2. Sabar, mo tggu gw dandan lama ato janjian lama bahkan sampe 2 jam lamanya..
3. Baikkkkkkkkkk,, dr mulai bwin tas kl gw cape, bliin makanan kl gw lg mls trs tdr"an seenak udel d tmptny, bliin gw kacang ijo kalo ngidam, jemput gw dan biarin gw tdr taw" uda sampe bkin gw brasa naik pintu kemana saja and so on..
4. Love his family, independent, and mature,
5. Has a good sense of humor,
6. Has a deadly sight ;))
7. Smart, and Down to earth
8. A good negotiator,
9. Always hear what i said,
10. Could run the business well,
11. He let me choose everything for date, vacation, even clothes... but he still has authority which somehow always make me not crossing it in any way..

(this picture is made by me for our 5-month-anniversary, in a spare time during SAP training in Monsoon :D )

Photo qta yg bagus ada d hp yg error dan g ada reaksi dcolok k usb xD
Well not a good way to express love, still a few more, but that's ok..
If he read this he'll think i was joking :))
di mata gw... pacar gw ttp yg paling jelek =p



cheers