Bankrupt!

"Vindicating something, is harder than obtaining."

I finally open my laptop after a week of absence, since I’m doing SAP workflow training.

No plan, nonetheless I browse all pictures seen on fb home page.

I saw pictures of a friend of mine’s birthday.

Then I hover my mouse cursor in the people tagged, then I saw few names I’ve not ever been contacted, a while..

I saw my friend’s status, and do not realize how she changes her life into more “valuable” now.

I also read another friend’s and knowing how happy she was while I’m gone,

But I also read some of them bugged about something I haven’t been told :(.

I saw some picture of places people visited, and I haven’t.

I also saw my friend’s wedding picture minus me because I couldn’t come :(

Me (with no intention) click on a couple-pict, which the boy was actually mine (crap, don’t believe it), I mean was actually supposed to be mine, I called it my first love :D. My heart was still beating. Not love beat, but memory beat (?). Like, someone has amnesia and suddenly reminiscing something, got it? Weellll this was actually no connectivity with the thing I'm talking about. Just forget it, I don’t know why I wrote it. So stupid. xD

(continue..)

I saw pictures of people surrounding me as team, also my sweet rivals :D.

Few of them has married, few of them disappeared, few of them, I haven’t call or sms his/her back 'till now.

Sh*t.

I saw a picture of people near me, but then I found out they’re too busy, especially on weekend &@%!.

Last, I clicked on my cousin’s album, realized how far she is from here. Miss the sharing one roof time :(

Then I realize how many things I have lost.

Maybe if it is related to money, I am bankrupt now.

Just like my blog post title, I am in trouble of vindicating something.

But I’m not saying it like I’ll start retrieving one; I don’t know where to start still.

Friends are cat and birds sometimes..

some of them going far away but still returns,

some other are around, but they won't coming back.

When we were teens, we play with everyone who gave us plenty of pleasure time.

But when we grow old, we only hang out with someone who gave us only their couple of spare time.

Ps. I don’t wanna grow old :(

Really!

Anyone??

Jangan Menyerah (my version)

reff1:

syukuri apa yang ada
hidup adalah anugerah
tetap jalani hidup ini
melakukan yang terbaik

reff2:
Tuhan pasti kan menunjukkan
kebesaran dan kuasanya
bagi hambanya yang sabar

dan tak kenal putus asa

"jangan menyerah.. jangan menyerah.. jangan menyeraaaaaaaaaaaaaa..aaah.."

Am not a fans of d'masive.
The only personnel i know is Ryan, which claims, looks like my friend's ex :P
But if i should give this band an award, it would be: TERngiang-ngiang.
Why?
Because the idea behind this song, the lyrics, and how they bring those in melody.
First i read this song review in one of the teen magazine (well my sister is still in high school)
This band was inspired by children who severe cancer and tumor in Dharmais, Jakarta.
Then in only 3 hours, the song was born.
It bounds in my memory, since i have friend who hv similar sickness.
From that day on, I really can't forget the song, especially the quotes i typed above.

Moreover, as a ordinary human who lives in capital city, of course clash with problems.
and the word long last : "jangan menyerah".
Amazing isn't it?
This song could absorb any kind of matters.
Me, myself, have intentionally connected the song to whatever problems in me.

The moment i remember my friends (i mentioned before).
The moment i was tired with routinity.
The moment i want to achieve higher but impaired by morality.
The moment i insist to have something but God thinks otherwise.
The moment i was physically sick.
The moment i was sad, broken, tortured, crestfallen..
(..still a lot more)
Until the moment I am angry with lack of humanity, poverty, governmental failures, global warming.
The song still catch along..

:D

That's why i put this song to my ipod: Top Rated list.
And when i bumped into trouble, i play it.

keep on fighting!

cheers :D

Be Left :(

On my daily activities, specifically when am work..
I work together with my seniors in the same field
only me, the junior.
and they really comfortable to talk &work with
I ask everything and consult everything :(
It's like..
Sam the Bro, and Mr.Pendi the (2nd) Dad :p
Those two guys easing me every time i face the critical situations, which needs 1 minute of magical touch so the program will be run as expected..

Yesterday morning, Sam got the phone call, which ends up with roll him off to T*T*L project.
He said only a month, but I'm not sure AT ALL.
It is SHOCKING because i really hate the "allocation curse"..
The program(S) he previously created and changing every month, during Month End Closing.
Really sidestep it cause it holds me in office until 12 AM xD
Yesterday evening, the gmail notification shout me an email with subject: "Release from M***M*S project"
i thought its my release :p
but it is nooooooooooooottt.. (hukk)
but Mr.Pendi is.
He explained his release to me in "informational way" but i read it as "adios" xD
then he mentioned at a glance what should i do then after his leave.

am not afraid, actually.
but nothing frighten me than make me feel "alone" :(
well i hv one member of team remaining, it is Teguh.
He is also like Bro.
But he's like an older bro, and does not like russel in ways me and Sam did :p
..and many topics we can share together..
hu..

Today, was a hand over session w/ Mr.Pendi, and Sam will be on Monday.
Which, i hate it..
Its a session, which sentence like: "If am not here" mentioned repeatedly.
And off course i hate it because, i can't work with him anymore :(
I listen to him and Thank God I understand.
It's not the 1st time he leaving me.
But the feelings always like the first.

I left my thumb drive in his Thinkpad.
He copied me ALLL the material he's been taken care of in the project.
All of them.
We had a different place to lunch.
And when i got back,
I only found my thumb drive in my own laptop.
And he's gone :(


why can't i be cool with project roll off xD
miss you both already :(

a wish (not) comes true (yet)

I have a secret, wish supposed to be not xD
It upsets me when you tell people and they do not believe if u really like what you are doing..
well, i think, the appeareance appeals which i gives to people was: a flashy fingernails shimmy" lipgloss barbie off the dirt?
thanks! but you know what?
I loooOOOOve (trying to make the long 'O' google effect) cooking.. so much!
even now i think am addicted to it.

well am still a beginner but i love to to cook anything.
especially when i did lucky to cook with simple ingredients and turn it "magically" into unusual food which my grandmother and my dad would say: "this is delicious!"
:D happy..

my latest brew was a marlin 'special" teriyaki which i made my only use: 2 marlin fillets, bombay onions, blackpepper, soya sauce, and a tip tea spoon of chinese five seasons (:p cook cheat) - cinnamons, star anise, cloves, fennel, and pepper)
it is very quick and easy to make and my grandma and my dad look satisfied =p yayyy

the stupidest part is...i forgot to take the picture xD

my head always juggling onions, mushroom, pasta, wheat flour, eggs, pepper, chili, and so on, and what i can do to them. And my mother is getting her new headache watching me cooking, and stay long.. slowly but surely, 'equipped' the kitchen :p.

i dont know why, and where i got this new habit.
as long as i know my favorite show now are: rachel ray (the cooking part), ala chef, and discovery travel and living.
is it an aging syndrome O.O? oh no..

Lately i thronged my brain with books of fancy breakfast recipe.
and then i found a beautiful picture of typical bread shape.
it's a waffle!
i totally fall in love with the shape..

(oooh..)

and also the waffle toaster~! :D
i've visited an e-store, and it costs IDR 200,000.
not really expensive i think, but, i'm still thinking about it.

well, actually i can't stop thinking about it xD

am enjoying my hands smells like pepper, onions, paprica, etc and am still learning a lot :D

and am still finding people willing to be "guinea pigs" to taste my "brews" *hahaa*
happy cooking! :D

cheers

a bit of touch

with a bit of touch of:

1) Pressure
2) "Irresistible" people xD
3) Unexpected circumtances
4) monotous environment & activity
5) Ego
6) hopeless efforts
7) impatient
8) economic & social demand
9) a pile of difficult material to understand xD, and
10) PMS


there are prompt ways to reveal your bad side of your character :))
which u don't absolutely know before..

so if you think you don't hv any bad side,
or you think you've known enough about your character,
and already listed down your Alter Ego..

never underestimate what those 10 would reveal


it works!


*salam pusing*

earthquake, isn't it a crisis moment??

gempaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
berasa bgt y dgoyang sanasini kek mainan tower bloxx..
gempa 7,3 SR d tasikmalaya yg sampe post ini dirilis (ehem) uda terjadi 72x gempa susulan..
eniwei, gempa susulan bhs inggrisny apa ya?
continuous earthquake? (gempa susul"an xD)
continuation earthquake? (gempa lanjutan @-))
subsequent earthquake? (ini baru bnr kekny stlh nanya sm tmn kantor yg 9 taun d amerika =p)

kmrn kl g salah skitar jm 15.12-an wkt workshop d ruang meeting tiba" qta smua "bergoyang"..
awalny qta g mkir kl itu gempa, krn biasa deh..
"ada yg goyang" kali" (walopun ank kcil jg taw kl ada orang goyang" g mgkn sampe se-lantai gedung goyang efeknya)
"pusing kali" (walopun jrg banget ad kjadian pusing massal)
akhirny someone of us run away and we followed it that way xD!

qta turun k bawah.
untungny krn cm lantai 3, tenggorokan gw yg puasa ini g kebangetan berasa hausnya :D
dan untungny lagi smua slamet, kluarga, tmn, pacar, smua slmt ALhamduuuulillah
wktu gw turun dan liat orang"
gw jadi ktawa" sndiri krn orang" itu ternyata lucu ya..

1.Susu, tmn kantor gw turun k bawah bw modem telkomflash, ini g membuktikan bahwa d saat gempa telkomflash bs berfungsi menyelamatkan hidup xD
2.Nanang, tmn kntr jg bawa buku serupa buku diary. Hal ini membuat gw bertanya" apakah dia smpet update DIARY saat turun tangga??
3.Mas erwin, bawa notes isi coret"an angka bwt closing. Sang project manager ini mgkn ttp manfaatin wkt turun tangga jg bwt itung alokasi kmudian hasilny dcatat d bawah =p
4.Irene, bawa" tas komplit + majalah fortune. Gw berpikir orang ini super duper prepare, bahkan sedia bacaan untuk menunggu waktu evakuasi selesai dan dnyatakan aman untuk naik kembali xD
5.Tmn" lain yg bawa hape, dan gw, ini wajar, krn qta butuh tlp sanak saudara dan orang" tersayang :D
6.Orang d gedung yg bawa bungkusan makanan :)) i'd rather think she was panic than prepared food while waiting to be evacuated or spending the time waited to be rescued.
7.Org kntr yg g bawa apa", mas pendi, ken dll, ini adalah orang yg bisa jadi too panic, bs jg care sm kselamtan sndiri dlu :D

but guys, cell phone is a MUST. apapun alesanny qta butuh komunikasi, rite :D

Kejadian lucu lainnya pas gempa adalah:
1. Sam, tmn kantor gw, bgtu turun langsung update twitter dan cm blg "earthquaaaaaaaake"
2. Mas didi, tmn kntr gw yg blg d twitter, "kl gempa ada hadist-nya untuk segera berbuka ga?" ahaha
3. Dan berbagai postingan lainnya d twitter yg bkin gw mkir, is it a crisis moment? or not?

Tp top of the TOP hari ini adalah tmn gw, Mayang.
tmn gw yg kbtulan lagi ceting pas gempa langsung tulis:
"GEMPAAAA tls aja dulu",

g pake mkir kl gempa TIDAK terjadi LOKAL :)) skali lagi GEMPA g terjadi LOKAL may :))
ahahah, gara" dy crt ini gw ktawa sndiri d kntr :D

akhrny line ini jd lucu"an qta bersama dan qta mkir kmungkinan" lain about last word they typed before run from earthquake yesterday :D

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA...brb (mgkn dy berpikir turun k bawah wktuny sama dgn cm skedar mampir k toilet)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAAA.. off dlu y (mgkn dy berpikir untuk bw laptop dan matiin modem, gulung charger,copot mouse, fdisk..and so on.. then head to emergency stairs)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAAAA..gtg (ini aga wajar mengingat kl gempa mmg qta harus Got To GO)

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA.. miss you (orang pacaran yg olwes tls ini sblm pamit)

tapi ttp aja yg plg lucu hari ini y itu..

A: GEMPAAAAAAAA... tls aj dlu...
aahhahahaha..
ada g y orang yg bales cetingan stelah dkasi taw ad gempa
hhahahahah (g bs berenti)

LOL
piss may :D

cheers

Mesem-mesem

Ahhaha.. gw baru aja g sngaja baca blog sherina, dan dengan sengaja bc blog raditya dika.
aneh y :))
bwt sbagian orang yg bc ini mgkn mkir "penting y?"
ato mgkn dah basi krn britany uda menyebar luas d situs" gosip, radio, tv, even twitter..
and a few days ago, i just caught them talking tenderly to each other with nothing to cover up anymore, keeps me giggling all the time i remember haha..
lucu y, sherina emg unpredictable (bwt yg ngerasa gw uda ngmg gini, sorry kl bosen :D)
what she do, and what she likes..
what she write, and what she read..
what she listen, and what she sing..
her image which is transforming suddenly and also her type ;)) - reminds me of myself a few years ago, when,,, am young *haha*
decided to love someone who just i feel comfortable with..
g ada pertimbangan lain", suka aja, pasti itu jawabanny kl ditanya :))

d blog, sherina puji" si kambing jantan..
tiba" gw jadi merasa g mo kalah jg puji" pacar gw (haha)
d samping emg gw jrg puji" sampe dy ragu gw bnran sk sm dy ap ga..gw mo coba :D
pacar gw itu....:
1. Jelek (oke, its totally screwing the theme)
2. Sabar, mo tggu gw dandan lama ato janjian lama bahkan sampe 2 jam lamanya..
3. Baikkkkkkkkkk,, dr mulai bwin tas kl gw cape, bliin makanan kl gw lg mls trs tdr"an seenak udel d tmptny, bliin gw kacang ijo kalo ngidam, jemput gw dan biarin gw tdr taw" uda sampe bkin gw brasa naik pintu kemana saja and so on..
4. Love his family, independent, and mature,
5. Has a good sense of humor,
6. Has a deadly sight ;))
7. Smart, and Down to earth
8. A good negotiator,
9. Always hear what i said,
10. Could run the business well,
11. He let me choose everything for date, vacation, even clothes... but he still has authority which somehow always make me not crossing it in any way..

(this picture is made by me for our 5-month-anniversary, in a spare time during SAP training in Monsoon :D )

Photo qta yg bagus ada d hp yg error dan g ada reaksi dcolok k usb xD
Well not a good way to express love, still a few more, but that's ok..
If he read this he'll think i was joking :))
di mata gw... pacar gw ttp yg paling jelek =p



cheers

Drama Queen

Ahahah i've just watch comedy movies..
a bit drama, a bit cheesy, but cute, inspirational, relaxing, imagining, ok stop.
these two are the movies i watch last weekend:

on saturday:


this story tells about how a success thrill woman (roled by Sandra Bullock, whose body was perfectly charming in her age! especially on a pencil shape skirt... *o*), struggles to save her blast carrier (since its he only good thing she has after her parents died), by not to be deported -due to not valid visa, by pretending to be marrying someone, who is actually her (sexy) secretary - Drew Paxton (figured by Ryan Reynolds), and.. you know how it ends =p

well, as i always do (over attention) on scenario, this film is a bit rather undemanding touchable, but undoubtfully sweet :)
here's the piece:

Margaret: oh, i can see any dissapointment.
Drew : yes you did. And, imagine my dissapointment, when i was standing alone, in a barn, wifeless. Because, i realized, that the woman i loved, was about to be deported. So, Margaret, marry me. because I'd like to date you.
hahaah.. ryan reynolds just so expressive saying this, especially the bold one.


on sunday (on dvd):



it's more complicated stories.
different people with their own love life problems, resist guy who chase after and running away from them. Finding what's right or not, string signs from a guy as a drama, whereas they realize something that sometimes, if we can't be the exception in love - which is in a fairy tale- patiently, tragically hoping someone and after YEARS you (finally) got his heart (after you 100 years old).. we can be the rule who set the ends as you wanted:)

here's the quotes i remember the most..
Alex, starred by Justin Long (who is somehow........ cuter that ever)
Gigi, starred by Ginnifer Michelle Goodwin, which his face, voice and clothes, is overall cute :D

Gigi: I would rather be like that, then be like you.
Alex: Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?
Gigi: I may dissect each little thing and put myself out there so much but at least that means that I still care. Oh! You've think you won because women are expendable to you. You may not get hurt or make an ass of yourself that way but you don't fall in love that way either. You have not won. You're alone. I may do a lot of stupid shit but I'm still a lot closer to love than you are.


well in this film, not all is a happy ending..
but its ordinary powerful :D
refreshing me to start weekdays..
ops, one more, the narrator in this film also said..

"maybe the happy ending is just moving on. or maybe the happy ending is this: knowing after all the unreturned phone calls and broken-hearts, through the blunders and misread signals, through all the pain and embarrassment... you never gave up hope. "
(...friday, am in love in background)
Monday you can fall apart
Tuesday, Wednesday break my heart
Oh, Thursday doesn't even start
It's Friday I'm in love


isn't it beautiful?
can someone told me why do Americans simply can make exquisite quotes? xD



source:
http://harryallen.info/wp-content/uploads/2009/06/hes-just-not-that-into-you-poster.jpg
http://www.entertainmentwallpaper.com/images/desktops/movie/the_proposal01.jpg

in crush with phoebe russel

totally falling in love with this 5 years od Phoebe Russel.
she takes efforst collecting the cans, then get $1000 to feed thousands.
in a simple and innocent way.. just to finish her final project to graduate from his school.. :(
just can't imagine what adults can do if this girl can give so meaningful contribution to human society.. maybe she don't have any selfishness and subjectivity to others..
don't care what migh people say "impossible"..
and not hoping anyone's compliments..
if she wanted to help, she'll just then make it true..
and she did it asthonishingly..
very" adorable..
especially this letter:

(click to enlarge)

Many school in Indonesia should support practical examination like this..

so children in Indonesia would not ended up in jail because they don't care about the humanity..

so children in this country will care about themselves, olds, even animals..

and make here a better place to live..

and (still) then come the world peace :)

amin

source: (http://www.tonic.com/article/five-year-old-donor-feeds-17971-people/)

mo...ffats!

some people who grow up (read: grow old) love to reminisce their old times..
and here is my oldies moment: The Moffatts!
not this moffatts:

(this when they called 'maturity')

but this one:



(the 'cupu' one =p)

yeap, scott-dave-client-bob! yayy i still remember the names =p
and my lips keeps wording:
1) If life is so short
2) Girl am gonna get ya
3) Girl of my dreams..
4) Love
and so on..

and my heart is blinky, patterned, pounding, scenting of youth spirit! (lebay)
i remember sweet times with my girl friends, singing those song together..
dancing, to the right to the left (oh no)
dreaming a prince charming come to us and singing, begging us to be their's such like that..
and now that we're grow up, we realize that nothing is really pure sweet :)

*ps: thanks to manyong who give me moffats album :D

Netweaver Poison!

oke, isi blog ini bukan ke-IT-IT-an.
yang bener artinya adalah: gw pusinggggggggggg..
gw pusing sm netweaver technology yg 1 ini, PI (was known as XI)
bentukny se.. sederhana aj sperti di bawah ini

(disensor atas kepentingan pihak" terkait :D, click to ENLARGE)

tapi krn kliatanny sederhana itu gw jadi kesel sndiri -> begini aj koq g bs hehe
pdhl asli dalemny mumet abis, tampilan menipu skalee..
emg se gw dah pernah dpt training, well bukan training, but introduction,
tapi langsung bikin, tapi(nya lagi) g hands on (bingung kn) tapi(oke, ini yg terakhir kalinya gw pake kt tapi) ad jeda kerja yg lumayan panjang, bgtu liat lagi smggu ini..
DUENGGGGGGG.. gw lupa :D
sbenerny mas pendi, senior gw dah sounding" gw suru baca material training, ttg netweaver, PI dll dan emg gw ckup ngerti di bagian integration buildernya, walopun g terlalu teoritis, krn lagi" langsung djejelin bikin, tapi di enterprise service builder a.k.a integration repositorynya...
tu..la..lit..

gw g brani tanya banyak" krn qta smua emg g pernah dpt deep (serious) training soal ini,
but somehow I WANNA KNOW MUCH (AND MORE)!
jadi drpd gw tny" dan dtegasin lagi kl qta hampir g pernah urus yang itu dan itu urusan orang IBM malaysia.. mending gw (sok) cr taw sndiri..
walhasil, gw pusing mana di internet training materialny sedikit, krn d indonesia jarang ad yg pake jg, dan netweaver blm bgtu ngetop dsini.. jadi cm d client ini aja gw dpt referensi..
gw dah berusaha dan mentok di bagian "what need to be concerned when creating message operation mapping.."
well, sbnrny gw pengen taw syarat" gw harus bkin A ato B, linkage-ny masi rada brantakan di otak gw dan gw ngertiny cm spotong".. udah gtu gw ksulitan nemuin tampilan layar di bawah ini bwt explore:

(feel so moron.., click to ENLARGE)

gaptek banget ga seee xD
ya doakan saia smoga bsk (lbh bisa) ngerti lagi
tapi bsk otak gw kekny kepake bwt yg lain, training CO di monsoon!
gw lupa full day every thursday =.='
berarti gw bakal lewatin bbrp step PI development, walopun mo diupdate sm mas pendi hari jumatnya..
well, look at the bright side~~
bsk gw makan sushi (again, finally) dan fitness VIP membership free d citywalk (yeah!) sama meila =p for anyone who promote me, thanks for make it happen in a very appropriate time :D


oia, hari ini mobil gw mogok dan rusakny cukup parah :(
mari qta berdoa bersama" smoga gw cepet bs bli mbl baru.
aaaaaaaaaammmmiiinnnnnnnn...

World Peace

ps:

send my deepest condolences to all victims, and their family, of ritz-mariott tragedy.

who die, so be peace in heaven.

who left, then be strong and patient.
hope the bomber(s) get what they want so this disaster will not be happened anymore.
hope the justice 'emerge' from the wreckles.
and then come the world peace.
amin.

*heal the world-Michael Jackson*

really need to go back young

Have you ever felt like u’re old enough to dream?
Not be able to change your direction to breakthrough since it’s your save zone?
Or to laughing at yourself and too be so objective to say NO to something you don’t like because it is hip or maybe.. profitable?
Yes you’re an ADULT.
Am speaking about age, not maturity.
When we go old (and boring) we start to think what have just lost, instead of what we will get in the future.
Since we’re thinking that we’re the future.
What you are now, how you are now, start making you not comfortable. I don’t know if it’s carrier, love, looks, health, money, or mix of those (well, that sucks).
Sometimes bring you back to couple years ago, moment when you say YES or NO to some thing that change everything.
Makes who you are now.
For example me, if I was say YES to work in music institution with initial ‘P’, maybe I would not ended up like sitting in front of computers watching codes and numbers responsively, eating a box of cornflakes or instant foods to keep myeyes open for 3am in the morning (or worst I ever, 5.30am).
Or maybe I will still do that, but I have happy SMILE :) at me, thinking about the audience clapping their hands altogether after watching me playing.
Well, during the overtime I never see clapping hands (?!)
I also not sure about the SMILING face part, but hey it’s just kind of “IF ONLY” thing, there’s no rules =p
The worst, that be tag line is.
You started to think that you’re not somebody you’ve been wanted before.
Then you start sneaking some people’s life, begin from people near you.
Your best friend which maybe not working but happy, your friend who works and makes benefits double than you got, your friend who gets more credit card than you-makes she looks like more affordable, your friend who not thinking bout money but socially complete, your friend who can write/sing/play music/dance/cook better than you.
Lots more.
Congratulations for constantly being their selves until today *^^*
I am regretting several of things in my past life.
even simply, i regret yelling at my boyfriend just because my mood is now upside down.
But surely I can’t turn back time.
wishes exist to help you choose.

You know,
sometimes we can not achieve dreams, but we still can be close to it.

Cheers ^^

transformer membuat hape saia hilang!

*--

3 hari blkgan ini berturut-turut gw mengalami KEHILANGAN. ilang tupperwear ksayangan, ilang charger hape, ilang charger laptop, dan terakhir: ilang HP :(( what a moron..
kmrn gw rengek" k pacar, blg "km koq mo py pacar bloon kek aq" - pdhl kl tiba" pacar sadar trus kabur, bahaya jg wekeke..
hape oh hape.. kesayangan gw yg bela"in pesen warna brown-warna kesukaan gw :(( design graphicnya.. desainnya..aghhhhhh d-a-m-n
kenapa se g ada orang baik di dunia grrrrrrrrr
ini dy knp gw blg film transformer berbahaya, krn hape gw ilang abis gw nntn TRANSFORMER!!!
awalny gw cm bales sms jhon yg nanyain program gw, trus hp gw taro d pangkuan gw.. nah karena seruny itu film gw sampe nganga bengong" g sadarkan diri.. gw bnr" lupa sama yg namanya hape,
trus.. ilang deh :(
bloon banget g seeee?? :((
kehilangan hape krn keasikan nntn transformer... =.='
terkutuklah orang yg ngambil..huh..
gw skrg g bs smsan, soalny hp esia gw jg masa tenggang abis.. mo online cari" hp bwt ganti baru, charger laptop ilang jg ahik.. akhrny pinjem thinkpad pacar..wikiki gw pake thinkpad seri X >:) ..kerennnnnnnnnnn dan ergonomis! suka dee....
agh gw jadi pengen banget thinkpad..s-h-i-t
y skrg gw lagi mengumpulkan kembali ingetan gw sm barang" gw yg ilang
gw rasa barang" tu ad d kantor, soalny lembur 2 hari lalu dah bkin gw g konsen sangat!
pegel-cape-TEGANG..
lmyn jg abis fish spa.. hhohho..kmrn gw cobain
bnr" GELI kyakaka tp lama" enk jg :D
tapi tupperwear gw yg (kyny) ktggalan d kntr kn g ktm tuh.. jangan" charger laptop gw jg :((
asset perusahaan tuh T_______T ms potong gaji gara" itu...
ilang charger, ilang hp, berarti bkl ad hp baru
ilang charger laptop, berarti ada laptop baru??? *ngarep*
agh gw pengen banget thinkpad,
dan samsung i780
-ato SE x1.. :(

tapi gw lagi mo bli mbl,
dan mo k surabaya, jember, bromo :(

ada penyandang dana yg mo bantu kemelaratan saia???
or i'd rather call 911?

overtime

*--

dsini lembur sodara-sodara..
gw d ruang private mini-karena mas pendi g ada dan dsuru gantiin.
udah tgl sm mas erwin doang, yg bolak balik srat srot kena flu (bukan) babi *hehe*
d luar masi ada linda, meila, inne, tuing, nanang, ken, lala, mas andrian, teguh, sm yg plg kasian sam - karena dtgguin berat sm mas erwin d sblhnya soale bsk mo in lieu :))
smntr gw nunggu tuing testing program yg gw bnrin, yg misinya adalah: kalo g naik production jgn harap bisa pulang.
yap, hr ini closing, d sap, skrg dah ganti taun jd 2010 =.='
interface masi ngaco" dan mesti feed ulang xml" d PI wlpn g skrg kekny..krn gunawan dah gugur a.k.a muleh..
kpala gw pun sbnrny dah pusing dr td siang, krn mkirin hal bodoh (baca: ftp) yg gw g pernah pegang tp harus sok taw uda bs =='
dan pacar jg harus sabar krn dah brp kali aja gw batal k kosan dy hahaha..
hari pertama binus 'sndirian', brasa kangen jg, dan seneng krn kek reuni lagi ktm meila-linda-teguh d minamas :)
ada yg lucu 2 hari ini, mas andrian tiba' sk comment hal" tak terduga.. dr mule muji gw hebat bs taw suara gearbox sampe tanya apa gw pernah ikut kelas table manner haha..
bkin gw serem melakukan sesuatu yg salah :D
trus si inne, yang maksa" liat jempol gw bwt liat ruas pertamanya, yg lurus apa ga garisny..
hasilnya, dy blg calon suami gw jelek, cm gara" krn garisny g lurus bwakakaka..
mas andrian tb" nyeletuk "berarti bener lo kl jadiny sm dadan" hahahahahahahahahahaha

tengkyu ne.
tengkyu mas andrian.

duh uda jm 1/2 9..
pala pusing, berat dan sangat ingin pulang..
tolong :(

1 phrase

it's so hard to find somewhere in 'place' u will be comfort in and show that u're somebody.
:(

17 again

I just saw seventeen again this evening,
performed by matthew perry and of course, the super charm – zac efron
Then more and more realize that: He does have beautiful two perfect-blue-eyes *o*
And it costs me at least IDR 200.000 *) to make mine also blue..
Iri iri..hahaha
pengen mata kek gtu :(


*) contact lens, for sure ;))

2nd Graduation

To my project-team-colleague,
Here's our first day, work separately from each other.
I would like to say..

Thank you to my friends,
It's very very fun to work with you all.
Nice to have so much amaaaaaaazzzing experience of our crazy-overtime until so long hard discussion :)
Learning how you all expert-to-be, study from the same level, 'till achieving what u already got now.
It's very appreciated me a lot, knowing success people from the very beginning :)
U all such a great learner, great student, great warriors, great consultant.
Thanks for completing my first-work-life-journey in this field.
I learn a lot. :D
--hope u learn something from me *wink*
I'm gonna lost my childish and sharing moment with Meila, and feelings as a little sister of Linda, make Susu as a joke of highschool chic hahaha.
Not to mention my twin-syndrome and salmon maki time with Chan-chan, consult ABAP things and enjoying dave koz with Teguh, and last but not least my fighting and laughing time with Pandu :)).
My asking-babies-thing-question-habit with Ms.Tavitha, u're baby would be as beautiful and smart as you are :). Thanks for guiding me along this time. Understanding my tu-la-lit "gift" hehe. And forgive me for errorS i made through Dev and QA testing =p.
Thanks for trusting me and support me to become also FI consultant like you. I'll learn :D
Ouch, i missed one person, also lucky meeting this senior consultant-businessman-and amateur comedian, eccentric combination isnt it?
Mas dadan, never thought that am gonna missing you. We'll be always together, rite? ;)


Thanks to BiNus team,
Which take care of us seriously..
Thank you so much for giving us such a tutor-attention. Forgive me if we're doing something wrong. And appreciate us when we do something right.
You were the first for us, and so we were.
We felt such a homy environment - and condusive also.
We're learning a lot - about finance, business, management, relationship.
Will miss the time mostly with Elia, Eka, and FIS team which working hard to achieve smooth go live.
Esp. Jhon, huhu, gonna miss u a lot my friend.
Thanks for helping me and supporting me on doing ABAP program @_@. It was fun to have a partner like you. Please keep my legacy for you =p 25 interfaces, 17 enhancements, 8 reports, and so on as you can find in realisation folder haha.
You can contact me anytime - inofficially :D
Thanks to Juki, Adit, Sisi, Eko and Ferry - yang uda mendaulat gw jd model colongan, bs jadi kenang"an skrg kl diliat :( blm py poto gw rambut pendek kn? *winkwink*
Thanks bwt philip, yang di awal" sering gw recokin dgn pertanyaan" g penting hehe. Sayang y lippp lo g bs liat rambut gw panjang lagi :(
Not to forget thanks to Mr.Ari, which with-no-intention open my carrier path in this field. You're such an eccentric PM i've ever seen. Hope you will always success in work, and also love life ;)) *oops.
Thanks to All Finance team, which trying so hard together, so we can start closing soon :)
Thanks to BiNus,
Thanks for hatching me out from the egg :)
Gonna miss you all


Ps: @ BiNus: also very" thankyou for boost-internet-speed ;)) c u at next project (maybe?)

pikiran kotor

do you know what kind of thought bothering you so much about friend?
that when you feel she/he act differently,
that when you think she/he likes you anymore,
that when you think she/he's not giving anytime for you both together,
and more clear when she/he never mention you at his case..
that when you feel no relationship-not familiar-instead of boundaries.
that when you start to feel you're the only one who's trying to be in relationship..
that when you feel she/he's not listening to you seriously,
that when you feel strange,
that when you can feel anything but distance,

you can not say we better break up.
Friendship is forever, right? *sigh..
will friend (like this) be forever?

picture in old city

entah kenapa pengen post poto ini.

Thanks to Adit and friends for taking this picture.. :)

Life is now fun :D

About my job,
Gw senang, karena pihak kantor kasi offering bgs after-contract-period dan skolah gratis bwt sertifikasi int'l dr monsoon :) Alhamdulillah, karena pastiny gw g sanggup bayar sendiri. dari sekian orang d kantor beruntunglah qta dpercaya untuk belajar pala-pundak-lutut-kaki spy (harus) lulus dan jadi senior consultant bersertifikasi - kek tukang pijet xD
Tapi skrg gw lagi mikir, mo ambil modul apa. kita dikasi kebebasan - bertanggung jawab, haha. wlpn gw ada d scope FI, tp belakangan ini gw (makin) sok-an kerjain+liat" kerjaan FI funct (baca: nyeleweng), emg bejibun dan bete, tapi efekny bagus jg bwt k depan. everlasting, kl kata pacar. berguna, kl kata nyokap. gw bener" butuh konsultasi k mas pendi. tp still, blm ada waktu. :( gw pilih apa ya?

About my activities,
Sekarang gw ad job baru, ngajar orang main keyboard + vocal (bngung?) ngiringi mksdny. sdkt nyeleweng (lagi). tapi gw merasa emg sometimes gw butuh perubahan" dalam hidup yang (siapa tahu) lebih baik.
Thinking about social organization, fokus gw d tahun ini, mo re-apply lagi d yayasan, yg stelah 1 tahun lalu gw berhenti.
Memikirkan bisnis - jg skrg uda mulai jd fokus gw. Ada beberapa ide, tgl cari orang yg tepat untuk diajak gabung, dan tentuny, modal #-o.
Sampai saat ini ada bbrp kandidat, termasuk yg plg potensial, co gw sendiri - si "saudagar dagang" :))

ciao

i wish

i want him to heal..
i'll do anything -
takes him elsewhere taking therapy,
help him taking his medications,
manage him for what he eat and when he do exercises..
cook healthy food for him everyday -
set his bed time :(
set his work time
from the super-protective
'till as simple as giving him affection and spirit..
i just want him to get healthy..

:(

amin

Last One Standing

Maybe King and Queen
Could be so steady.
With the status and authority.
Maybe the lady at the storey should give the best fake smile,
Whenever king and queen walking through her..
Serve them with applause, pour them with compliments.
They're fit and love each other.
Perfect mate.
The lady come back upstairs.
And she swore,
though the queen possess the King formerly.
It's not guaranteed that she's the one.
They'll see..
Cause the one who has the biggest love.
would be the last one standing..

1st L.O.V.E

First love is strong.
It is one, undamaged, pure and unbreakable.
It’s brittle but not fragile.
It’s risky but gentle.
It’s luxury but free.
It’s invisible but sensible.
No condition, but a tough rule.
Once you think u have it, u are perfect.
Once you think u leave it, u are brave.
Once you think u lost it, u are break.
It is all that remain, until you meet second, third.. to hundredth.
First love is a legend.
You can say thousand words of figures as if you know him best from a first sight.
First love is adequate.
To feel every joy, every pain, every densely it takes with.
First love is seeping.
Like when you look right, your left, above and down, your back, even your heart when you close your eyes.
There will be only he….

....

sometimes i think, a simple thing..
maybe God give us a first love..
only just for us to know what love is..